I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
only if we run a train.
done.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
