Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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