I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
