Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
