People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize