I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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