what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
