this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
