Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
did i just pee glitter
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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