now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
