He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize