I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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