Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize