I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
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