This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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