if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize