im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
