Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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