The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize