What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
