My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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