Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
