im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Randomize
