i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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