How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Dignity is for republicans.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize