Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
