everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Randomize
