do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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