A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I forgot how hot balto sounded
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize