i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I think I just sharted jello shots
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