i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
