Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
