I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
