moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
