I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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