i can't believe i had my finger in that
i think i have two assholes
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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