He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
