so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
