Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I think people are normalizing furries
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
