I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
