i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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