I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
you win again, gameday.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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