If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
that is very illegal...i love you.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
