R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
