it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
