For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
