I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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