Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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