Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
