Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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